I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
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