I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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