yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
