none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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