never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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