they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
