capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Randomize