i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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