She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
So I just went to clothing optional bar
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
