He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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