my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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