I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Randomize