He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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