and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
