Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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