Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Randomize
