My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
