while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Randomize
