They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize