Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
