I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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