He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize