you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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