Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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