Your face is a jimmy john
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize