I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
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i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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