Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
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its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
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I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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