READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
