is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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