He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
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