Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
