It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Randomize
