We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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