im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
