that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Randomize
