I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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