he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
mondays should just be called national damage control day
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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