God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Randomize
