Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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