Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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