Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
