You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
