so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
