I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
