I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
