I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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