So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Randomize
