she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Randomize
