just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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