i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
You're like the curious george of whores
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
